We are Nature. We are Spirit.
1:1 Healing available Tues - Sat 10am - 7pm. Appointments only 07961 661843
Becoming Who I am...
If a story shared can just help one person, then it is worth it. If you are currently super sensitive to topics such as alcohol addiction; drugs or suicidal tendencies/ victim of a loved one committing suicide. Help is behind these links when you click on them. It's best to only read this below if you have a stronger mindset.​
My birth Mum left before I became 2 years old, so my Dad and me moved in with my Nanna. My Dad had previously served in both the RAF and Army for 15 years, then taking a 'civvy job' when I was sparking to life! He worked full time as an engineer in a factory and his older sister kindly took early retirement became my main care giver. She had never married or had any children of her own and was a devoted Sunday School Teacher. The housing estate I lived in was perfectly positioned between the countryside and an 18 hole golf course, which blessed my childhood friends and I with many wonderful adventures.
I became a young carer at 8, supporting both my Nanna who had Alzheimers and my Dad who took redundancy. Being sleep deprived affected my school life. My Dad loved God, but I think had suffered in early childhood during WWII, then serving in the RAF and the Army. Unfortunately, over time, my Dad lost total interest in life.
I was not equipped mentally to watch my Dad give up, so I escaped to nature when I could. As I got older, I explored other ways to escape, such as drugs and alcohol. Back then, there was little awareness on the dangers and I took my first drug when I was 11 and at 14 worked part time in a nightclub. I remember how music and dancing really lifted my vibe, plus everyone at raves were so open. I know it's such a cliche, but I really felt 'peace, love and happiness man.' We hugged each other so much, watching sunsets and sunrises with each other; something that just never happened at home. I remember the first-time heroin was offered to me when I was 15 years old, at a rave, I refused, thank God, a few others did not, and they eventually ended up either dead or with addiction issues. I now look back and know it was the friends who I was with who made it enjoyable, not necessarily the drugs.
At 18, my Nanna passed at 97 years old. I had done pretty well in my GCSEs, but unfortunately a teacher told me I should give up on the thought of university as I was not smart enough. I believed him. As a result, I only got 2 out of 3 A-levels which was not bad considering I did not study.
At 21, my cousin, who was like a brother to me committed suicide. He stuck a gun in his mouth and blew his head off. He was 22 years old. This affected me and my family hugely; I eventually had suicidal thoughts myself. I went on strong anti-depressants, other meds followed.
At 29, two family members' (Father & Son) died, and this made me think about my life and what I was doing with it. I had put others first for so long.
So in 2005, just before my 30th, I left my Belfast childhood home, making sure social care support was in place for my Dad, and moved to Scotland, Edinburgh. I changed career from I.T to working a few jobs in various schools as an assistant, returning to college part time completing my level 3. I was still heavily involved caring for my Dad, travelling home often.
I immediately fell in love with Bonnie Scotland and was a member of a soul nourishing hill- walking group; I got back into nature.. Around 2007, I received a call that my Dad had been arrested. At 75 years old he tried to kill himself and my whole world came crumbling down. I took leave from work and returned home. The charges were dropped, and when I done what I could, I came back to Scotland.
Before I knew it I was on 5 types of medication for chronic anxiety, chronic depression, insomnia - extra medication for the side effects. I was receiving flashbacks to childhood and it was extremely difficult. I tried counselling with a few folk, which unfortunately didn't seem to work for me. I was gradually losing myself.
I returned home in 2011 and my Father's dementia was worsening. I cared for him, worked full-time in special needs settings; studied 6 years part-time for a degree and worked at the weekends, looking after a young adult with Autism. I battled with alcohol at times.
I stopped all medication in 2015 as I did not want this to be my life. I do not recommend stopping meds unless you speak to your GP first. I made a big mistake of not tapering off properly and so had electric shocks through my head everyday for at least a month! In 2016 I felt I had no choice but to bring my Dad to a care home and I felt an enormous amount of guilt.
Simultaneously, I met my birth Mum in 2017, along with 3 half siblings! My Mum was not in a great place. She shared with me that she was raped at 17 and lost her baby boy after carrying him full-term. She went onto have 3 more girls but struggled in ways. She met my Dad at 42 years old and understandably, she told me she did not want me; my Dad persuaded her to. She left me at about 2 years old for I believe her own mental health. I discovered My Dad had known where she was the whole time and had lied about her whereabouts. I do feel he thought it was best. Both my parents passed in 2017/18.
Chronic anxiety & depression led me on a journey of self-discovery and for that I am extremely grateful.
​
My continuous learning has saved my sanity at times, with latter courses more focused on healing:​
-
BA Child & Youth Studies (level 6)
-
Children's Learning & Development (SNVQ level 3)
-
Forest School Leader 3 Trained
-
​ITC Outdoors First Aid & Paediatric First Aid
-
Numerous CPD & in-house courses such as: SQA Autism in Children & Young People; Learning Disability Awareness; Autism & Structured Play; Positive Behaviour Support; Epilepsy; Manual Handling; Infection Control; Food Hygiene
-
Safeguarding Children & Safeguarding Adults with Special Needs
-
IOSH Managing Safely
-
SQA Counselling
-
Diploma in Mindfulness
-
Ho'oponopono Certificate
-
Introduction to Ayurveda
-
Suicide Prevention
-
Transcendental Meditation
-
Rahanni Celestial Healing, levels 1 & 2 (Teacher)
-
Reiki Master Teacher
-
Spiritual Coach + Mentorship Program
-
QiGong Practice + Breathwork
-
​
I consider myself to forever be a student in all of these healing modalities which have saved my life.
I moved to England in 2018 for a fresh start. I have always loved Jesus; believed in God and I've always been a seeker, reading many books on philosophy, nature, religions, self development and spirituality.
During the first lockdown on furlough, I developed a morning routine of getting up at 5am. I was doing two hour meditations, learning, affirming, hugging trees, grounding, learning about essential oils, exploring Ayurveda and more! I began to feel a strong desire to share what I discovered so I created this website in June 2020 and then my outdoor playgroup followed, 'Wee Nature Spirits' (WNS) in Dec 2020.
Starting my playgroup (on two credit cards!) was a divine blessing. I found acceptance and non-judgement with families who inspired me to become who a truly am; LOVE.
I found my purpose again of helping others but this time round the help came equally back to me. Sadly, after 3.5 years, I had to close my playgroup in May 2024 due to the land I sublet from was sold. This was a very tough phase, as it was done in quite an unkind way and I had a couple of breakdowns - I got through them quicker though than ever before because of everything I've learned; plus my friends supporting me.
I decided to do a Reiki Master Teacher course, graduating in July 2024. My WNS parents and friends had given me some beautiful feedback from the last few years of me facilitating 1-1 Reiki treatments, alongside running the playgroup.
Now I am currently based up in Aberdeenshire, Scotland, creating awareness on the importance of self-love and hoping to empower others with my Nature Spirits Gatherings, Spiritual Guidance and 1-1 work.
One of the best pieces of advice given to me was 'take each day as it comes'.
Deepest Gratitude & Love,
Lulu & her wee cat Tiggy x
ps I am not a trained psychologist, and it is always a good idea to seek professional support. For this reason, I created a mental health & suicide resource section listing various wonderful organisations for adults, young people and children. This is part of my life story and I do not condone the use of drugs (they are illegal!) or alcohol recklessly. I've made many unhealthy choices in this lifetime but am working on choosing healthier ones.